Man, I look good for going on my 4th pregnancy.
27 months. Oh, Lord. How many more? This journey has been so long, so heartbreaking,.
How can I possibly put into words the aching of my heart, the yearning-deep down in my soul- to see my baby(ies)?
How can I explain how empty I feel when I think about not knowing who my children are?
How can I express the despair, desperation, and loneliness I sometimes feel?
How does a mom even begin to explain how much hear heart aches for, loves, and craves her babies?
How can I tell you what it is like to live my life in CONSTANT prayer?
The journey has been hard, but so oh, so blessed. How can I possibly explain how the Lord has changed us, grown us, loved us every.single.blessed. day on this journey?
How can I possibly put into words the ways that I have experienced God’s provision, God’s peace? I know that it has all been from Him.
I don’t have to. The Lord knows my heart. That is what is so beautiful about the Holy Spirit. I don’t have to explain. He knows. He shares. He feels. He provides. He comforts. He endures. Even when I don’t He does. Wow.
27 months and we are here. The thing that I love about our journey is that we have experienced so many “worst case” things. If someone told me 5 years ago the things that I would go through, I would never believe that I could live through it. But, here I am! Here we are. It has ALL been God and the support of my Bri, my family, and my friends. To everyone who has loved us, supported us, and prayed for us. Thank you. From the bottom of my desperate-mama-heart. Thank you, not just for loving me, but more importantly- for loving our babies. In case you haven’t heard- they are a pretty big deal. God has the most amazing kids in store for us and I just love them to pieces already.
So, here’s to 27 months- and praying that we do not see 28 months. Boldly believing that the Lord is putting the motions in place right now to orchestrate the moment that we will finally see the faces that we have dreamed of.